More Than a Name
by Qwi-Xux
Summary: Short story focusing on Tifa's relationship with Marlene and Denzel. Told in two parts. Takes place shortly after DoC. *Complete*
1. Can I Call You Mama?

**Author's Note: **I've had so many random plot bunnies bouncing through my head lately for FFVII, mostly about Cloud, Tifa, and their little family, so I thought I'd start jotting them down. This focuses on Tifa and the kids. It sort of stemmed from reading _On the Way to a Smile: Case of Tifa, _which I'm sure everyone knows took place before _Advent Children. _It said that Tifa introduced Marlene to people as her daughter. And of course, there was also the moment in _Advent Children _when Barret told Denzel to look after his mom. It then kind of evolved into this, because you know that those kids have to have issues, given everything they've been through at such young ages.

This will be two parts--the first part a look at Tifa and Marlene, called _'Can I Call You Mama?_' and the second a look at Tifa and Denzel, called, '_I_ _Don't Want to Call You Mom_.'

**Disclaimer: If I owned Final Fantasy, would I be writing fanfiction?**

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**Part 1 of 2**

_**Can I Call You Mama?**_

The first time Marlene called Tifa 'Mama,' she was having a nightmare. Tifa awakened to hear Marlene screaming for her, but it was not 'Tifa' she was shrieking in her half-awake, terrified state.

"Mama!"

Her screams roused everyone else in the house; Cloud reached Denzel and Marlene's room only half a second behind Tifa, his feet bare and his sword in hand, and even as Tifa reached Marlene's bed and pulled her into her arms, she could see the relief in Cloud's eyes. Relief that, even though Marlene was frightened, she wasn't in any danger.

On the next bed, Denzel was sitting up and blinking sleepily. When he seemed sure that Marlene was getting cared for, he slumped back down onto his pillow, though his blue eyes kept peering over worriedly.

Cloud rested his sword against the wall and came over to sit on the bed next to Tifa. Marlene was crying and shaking, her face pressed into Tifa's shoulder, clinging to her. Tifa met Cloud's eyes and he frowned a little. They both knew that there was not much to be done about the nightmares. They had enough of their own, and it would be impossible to expect that the kids would sleep peacefully every night, particularly given everything they had seen and been through. Monsters, kidnappers, diseases, battles, death--it was really a wonder that they held together as well as they did.

The nightmares had been worse lately, though, particularly for Marlene. Cloud and Tifa had discussed it, and both were positive it was because it had only been two months since they had left the children behind to go help Vincent fight. This was following a year that had been probably the safest and most secure they had all had in a while. The crisis with Vincent seemed to have brought up the fears and insecurities that Denzel and Marlene had struggled with so much in their short lives--namely, fear of abandonment, fear of being alone.

Cloud reached out and laid a hand on Marlene's back, and at his touch, she turned her face toward him, tears still pouring down her cheeks. Her eyes moved up to Tifa's, and her face crumpled all over again, her cries turning into sobs. "Please don't go away," she said. "Please."

Tifa's chest constricted painfully. She hugged Marlene tightly, her arm encircling Cloud's hand in the process and pressing it more snuggly against Marlene's back. "I'm not going anywhere, sweetie."

"Everyone goes away," Marlene wept. "Everyone. Sometimes they don't come back. I don't want you to go away."

Tifa closed her eyes briefly. Barret was still out on the road, and would likely be there for a long time. It had been almost three years since he left Marlene to Cloud and Tifa, and though he visited Marlene and talked with her quite a lot, he seemed unable to really settle down long-term. In fact, Tifa knew that Barret was torn between his love for Marlene and his guilt for his sins and what they could do to her. He didn't know what to do anymore if he was not fighting. Just after they returned from joining Vincent on this last battle, he had taken Tifa and Cloud aside and flatly told them he was keeping Marlene in their care. He knew that he was her papa, and always would be, but he said that Marlene needed stability, and it wasn't something he could give her right now. And, he had added, Tifa was the only mother Marlene had ever really known. Marlene was growing toward being a young lady, and needed a mother in her life. At Seventh Heaven, she not only had a mother, but she had a brother and another father figure. Tifa understood Barret's decision. She had raised Marlene just as long as Barret had, and she couldn't imagine life without the little girl. She told Barret he was always welcome to live at Seventh Heaven--he had helped build it; he had _suggested _the idea of restarting a bar--but he said he wasn't ready for that. Maybe someday.

Tifa continued to hold Marlene, whispering soothing words to her. It took several more minutes before Marlene's weeping subsided, and still a few more before her body began to relax, until finally she was asleep on Tifa's lap. Cloud's hand was still pinned between her body and Tifa's arm. It didn't look very comfortable, but Cloud didn't seem to mind. He waited until Tifa shifted her arm enough for him to pull his hand free before moving, watching as she carefully settled Marlene onto her pillow.

Cloud stood and his eyes landed on something behind Tifa. She turned to see that Denzel was gazing at both of them solemnly. It was a moment before he spoke. "She cried herself to sleep tonight, after you left the room. She tried to be quiet, but…I heard her," he finally whispered, his eyes moving to Marlene. "I think she's scared."

Tifa was sure Marlene was scared, but Denzel didn't fool her. She saw the fear in his own eyes. Maybe she could get him talking. "Why do you think she's scared?" she asked softly, sitting on the edge of his bed.

"She's afraid you're going to leave again," Denzel whispered, dragging his eyes downward so he was no longer meeting their eyes, picking at his blanket nervously. "But I know you can't stay all the time. You have to help your friends, like they come to help you."

Cloud and Tifa made eye contact with each other again, and it was Cloud who answered, quietly, "Yes, Denzel, but--" another glance at Tifa, and then Marlene's sleeping, tear-splotched face. Cloud was quiet for a moment, searching for the right words. "We're here now," he finally said simply.

Denzel's eyes flashed up to Cloud's face before returning to his blanket. "Yeah." He didn't sound entirely convinced.

Cloud held out a hand toward Denzel. "Come on."

Denzel gave Tifa a brief glance, and she smiled encouragingly at him as he slipped out from under his covers and approached Cloud, who put a hand on his shoulder and guided him out of the room. Cloud grabbed his sword on the way, and Tifa stepped out into the hall, watching Cloud deposit his sword in his own room before leading Denzel downstairs to the bar.

Tifa smiled toward the stairs and then quietly returned to her room. Cloud was probably feeding Denzel something horribly sugary--but he would be doing it while talking to him about what was bothering him. It was what he always did. What he had been doing for over a year, when he returned from his long sojourn, healed of Geostigma, learning to heal his heart. Healing anything took a while, and hearts…hearts were fragile things, so easy to break and so hard to put back together.

Cloud had made a lot of progress, though. They all had.

A sigh escaped Tifa's lips as she glanced back toward the children's room. They still had more progress to make, but they could do it. She was sure they could, no matter how long they had to work on it.

Tifa returned to bed, but it took a little while before her alertness faded enough that she could fall back asleep. When she woke a short time later, she wasn't entirely sure what had dragged her to consciousness until she opened her eyes and saw the small figure standing at her bedside, holding tightly to a stuffed rabbit.

"Marlene?" Tifa whispered, quickly sitting up. "Did you have another bad dream?"

Marlene shook her head. "I just can't sleep."

Tifa lifted her blankets up, silently inviting Marlene to climb into bed beside her. She did so without any hesitation, squirming around until she found a comfortable position, lying on her side, facing Tifa. Tifa waited until she was settled before she let the covers down over both of them.

Marlene gazed at Tifa for a moment. "Tifa?" she asked in a quiet voice.

"Yes?"

"Is it…is it all right…"

Tifa wasn't sure if she had ever seen Marlene quite so uncertain when it came to asking something. Usually she was the most inquisitive child. "Is what all right?" Tifa asked, brushing Marlene's hair out of her face.

"Can I call you Mama?" Marlene asked quickly.

A warm feeling clenched around Tifa's heart, spreading until she felt the smile growing on her face. "Yes," she whispered. "Of course you can."

Marlene gave a smile of her own, snuggling closer to Tifa, closing her eyes with a contented sigh. Within several minutes, her breathing was slow and even, and only when Tifa was sure she was asleep did she close her own eyes and succumb to her exhaustion.

She woke to again find eyes on her, but this time it was Cloud who was standing at the end of her bed. She blinked at him, wondering drowsily just how long he had been standing there--and more than that, _why _he was standing there.

Marlene was still beside her, and had managed to pull the bedcovers off of Tifa and get them wound around her body sometime during the night. The sunlight streaming through Tifa's window was too bright for it to be just after sunrise, which was when she usually woke, and she squinted at Cloud. "What time is it?" she mumbled.

"Just after ten."

Tifa sat up quickly. "Ten? The bar opens in an hour! Why didn't you wake me?"

"Tifa, it's our day off."

Oh. Right. Tifa sank back against her pillow. "Is there--something you needed?" she asked pointedly, raising her eyebrows at him.

"Yuffie's on the phone. She's up in arms about something, but she won't talk to me." Cloud shrugged. "I thought it would be easier to wake you than hang up on her. You know the trouble she'd cause the next time she visits." He held up the phone in his hand, which had been out of Tifa's sight.

Tifa rolled her eyes at the notion of Yuffie's sort of trouble and held out her hand for the phone, but Cloud kept the mouthpiece covered and tilted his head slightly, his attention moving to Marlene. "How is she?"

"All right--for now," Tifa sighed. "How's Denzel?"

Cloud frowned. "The same. He's worried, but he doesn't want to really let us know that." He shook his head. "He thinks it's all his responsibility. He doesn't want to let anyone help carry his burdens."

Tifa quirked an eyebrow. "Well, that sounds familiar." Seeing Cloud's expression, she reached out and laid a hand on his arm. "You've learned, Cloud. So will he. He has you to help him, doesn't he?"

Cloud smiled at her, not with his mouth as much as his eyes, but it was one of his expressions that gave her warm tingles and brought a smile to her own lips. He handed Tifa the phone and left the room. Before Tifa could put it up to her ear, a small moan brought her attention to Marlene, who was awake, stretching and blinking at Tifa curiously. "Good morning, Marlene."

Marlene smiled sleepily. "Good morning…Mama. Is that Yuffie?"

Tifa could hear Yuffie's voice coming out of the receiver. "Hello? Helllloooo? Cloud! You better not have hung up the phone, you big--"

Tifa sighed again. "I guess I'd better deal with this," she said. "Maybe if you go see Cloud, he'll give you some breakfast."

Marlene brightened and jumped to her feet, no doubt already thinking about how to convince Cloud to let her eat leftover cake for breakfast. Tifa waited until she was gone before she pressed the phone to her ear, interrupting her friend's ranting. "Yuffie?"

* * *

**To be continued in part two, which as I said, will be focused more on Denzel.**


	2. I Don't Want to Call You Mom

**Author's Note: **This part took me a little longer, because I think Denzel's issues run quite deep and I think that he hides them better. My biggest problem in writing this is that I wrote it as a short piece, and really, I could write a chaptered story about Denzel and his issues. Trying to consolidate them into one post wasn't easy. So hopefully I pulled this off and managed to keep him in character. I drew on Denzel's background from _On the Way to a Smile: Case of Denzel. _I found it fascinating the first time I read it, and the idea that even two years after _Advent Children, _he was part of Tifa's family--it just made me all warm and fuzzy.

This didn't go quite like I had anticipated it, but sometimes that happens when you're writing. Hopefully it turned out all right. ;)

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**Part 2 of 2**

_**I Don't Want to Call You Mom**_

When Tifa went downstairs, she found Marlene sitting at the bar, drinking a glass of juice, an empty plate in front of her. An empty plate sprinkled with cake crumbs. If that hadn't been evidence enough, Marlene had frosting on the end of her nose.

Tifa shook her head slightly. Of course Cloud _would _give into Marlene's pleading.

"Hi, Mama! Cloud let me have cake!" Marlene exclaimed.

Cloud, standing behind the bar, threw Marlene a _'traitor' _sort of look and shrugged a little guiltily at Tifa. Marlene sighed heavily and said, "But he's making me eat some eggs, too."

A smile tugged at the corners of Tifa's mouth when she saw that Cloud did indeed have several eggs in his hand. She leaned against the bar and watched as he cracked them over a pan. He rarely cooked anything, and so it was always an adventure to see how his menu turned out. Marlene and Denzel had refused to let him make pancakes after several attempts that left their breakfast either doughy or burnt--Cloud could just not make them anywhere in between.

_At least, _she thought wryly, watching Cloud dig eggshells out of the pan, _he knows the names of all the vegetables now._

Marlene was still chattering away cheerfully, her nightmares chased away with the morning's light. Or, if not chased away, at least easier to hide.

"Is Yuffie all right?" Cloud asked.

"Oh, she'll be fine. She was ranting about her father and Wutai, some materia, and I think Vincent got mentioned in there somewhere. You know Yuffie." Tifa stretched and glanced around the bar. "Where's Denzel?"

"He's playing with some of the kids outside." Cloud scooped eggs onto two plates and set one in front of Marlene. The other he placed in front of an empty barstool, holding a fork out to Tifa.

Suddenly realizing that he had cooked her breakfast, Tifa's eyes widened slightly and she moved forward, taking the utensil from Cloud. "Thank you. You didn't have to."

He didn't answer.

"I'm sorry I slept so late," Tifa said, poking the eggs with her fork. "I just--"

"Haven't been sleeping well," Cloud finished quietly, looking at her for a moment before turning his eyes on Marlene. "Marlene, if you don't slow down, you're going to be sick."

Marlene's cheeks were stuffed and she was cramming eggs into her mouth so fast that Tifa was mildly amazed she could even chew. She finally managed to swallow. "But I want to play outside with Denzel." She shoved the last few bites in her mouth, hastily gulped down the rest of her juice, and leapt off of the stool. "Thanks for breakfast, Cloud!" she called, running for the front door, white frosting still dotting the end of her nose.

"You're welcome," Cloud said, but Marlene was already slamming the door behind her and didn't hear him.

Cloud's amused blue eyes met Tifa's, and he nodded down at her plate of food. "Are they really that bad?"

"Hm?" Tifa glanced down and realized she was just pushing the eggs around on her plate. She quickly took a bite. "No, they're good. They--taste like eggs." That got an actual chuckle out of Cloud, and Tifa grinned at him. "So are we doing anything in particular today?" That 'Closed for Business' sign had been the best present Yuffie could ever have given Cloud, because it had started the tradition of closing their businesses once a week and spending time with each other and the kids.

"I told Denzel I would help him put together that model airship Cid and Shera sent him," Cloud said.

So it would be a day at home. That would be nice; she could try to get some things done that she wasn't able to do during the week, and the kids would probably get out the games later.

However, the day didn't go quite as Tifa had anticipated it. When Marlene and Denzel came in for lunch, she knew as soon as she set a sandwich in front of Denzel that something was bothering him. He was quiet and he wouldn't meet her eyes, and seemed very intent on eating his food.

"Denzel?" she asked quietly. "Are you all right?"

Denzel glanced briefly at her and nodded too quickly. "Yes."

Tifa watched him carefully during the afternoon. After several hours of close observation, she finally realized that Denzel got rather squirmy whenever Marlene called Tifa 'Mama' or 'Mom.' He would avert his eyes at those moments, and go on with whatever he was doing as though Marlene hadn't spoken.

Tifa wasn't sure if Cloud noticed this in particular, but he knew that something was bothering Denzel. She saw Cloud talking to him a couple of times during the day, and she hoped that Denzel would be able to talk to Cloud about it. He had always had a much easier time telling Cloud his secrets than he had telling Tifa.

Tifa sighed to herself. Denzel was only nine. He shouldn't feel like he had to take the whole world on his shoulders. He was always so desperate to be grown-up, to take care of himself, but she wanted nothing more than for him to allow himself to just _be _a child.

Her eyes flickered back and forth between Cloud and Denzel, and she reminded herself that Cloud had not been so different when he was Denzel's age. Sometimes there were similarities between them that were almost scary--but maybe that's why it was right that Denzel was here, with them, growing up in this place. Maybe he could learn from Cloud's experiences so he wouldn't have to suffer through as much.

They all sat down together to eat dinner, and it was during their meal that Denzel's composure finally cracked. It started with a completely innocuous request. "Tifa, can I have more bread, please?" he asked.

As Tifa reached for the loaf of bread, Marlene piped up, "You don't have to call her Tifa anymore, Denzel! You can call her Mama! She said so!"

Denzel froze, and then, so swiftly it left Tifa blinking, he shoved his chair back and ran for the stairs.

Cloud and Tifa both rose to their feet, but at the echoing slam of the kids' bedroom door, Cloud looked at Tifa, his expression silently telling her, _I think this one is yours. _

Nodding, Tifa headed for the stairs, leaving Cloud to deal with Marlene, who was getting distressed because Denzel was upset and she didn't know why.

Tifa stopped in front of the children's door and took a deep breath. She wasn't entirely sure what Denzel was thinking, but she had some ideas. She knocked on the door before opening it and calling quietly, "Denzel?"

He was lying face-down on his bed, and he rolled away from her as she walked in, facing the wall. She approached, sitting carefully on the edge of his bed. "Denzel?"

She heard him draw a deep, shuddering breath. She gave him his space, waiting until he had composed himself and decided to face her. When he did finally look at her, his eyes burned brightly, but Tifa thought he looked more angry than sad.

"Hey," she said softly. "Can we talk?"

Denzel shrugged, trying to be indifferent and not fooling Tifa in the slightest. "About what?"

"About why you're so upset."

Denzel was quiet for a long moment, and Tifa added, "We don't have to talk right now if you don't want to, but--"

"I don't want to call you Mom," Denzel burst out. He turned his face away from Tifa, blinking rapidly.

For a moment, Tifa wasn't sure how to respond to that. There was obviously a deeper issue here. For Marlene, Tifa suspected that calling her Mama made her feel more secure. Secure in the permanence of her position, of her family. For Denzel…there could be so very many reasons behind this statement.

Tifa took a breath and let it out, gently touching Denzel's arm. "You don't have to call me Mom, Denzel. I don't expect you to, all right? I'm just happy to have you here with us. What you call me--it's not going to change how much I love you."

Denzel pulled himself up so he was sitting on the bed, again turning slightly away from Tifa so that she could only see half of his face. "Marlene's calling you Mom now," he said dully.

"You're not Marlene."

"I wish she wouldn't call you that," Denzel whispered.

Tifa felt a pang of hurt, but she knew it was irrational and pushed it away impatiently, searching for the root of this problem. She always introduced Marlene and Denzel as her kids, and Denzel had never objected. Had he just hit a point in his life where he was struggling with it now? Or had this been building up because she and Cloud had recently left? "Why do you wish that?"

"Because it means you'll go away!" Denzel burst out, swiveling to meet Tifa's eyes. "That's what moms do! They go try to help their friends and then they never come back! They leave you all alone and other people take care of you. And then you finally find a family again but it might go away, too, and you're my mom but if I just call you Tifa, maybe--maybe you won't go away."

Tifa wrapped him in her arms. She knew that what he called her wouldn't make a difference in whether she lived or died, and he had to know that, too, but this was fear, and fear was not always rational. How could she really dispute the sentiment _behind_ his fear, though? Denzel had lost so much, had lost everyone who had ever taken care of him until she and Cloud came along.

"Denzel…" Tifa closed her eyes, feeling his body tremble with the effort of holding back his tears. "I can't promise that nothing will ever happen to me, or to Cloud. I can't promise that nothing will ever happen to you or Marlene. I want nothing more than for you to be safe and happy, and it _is _scary sometimes, because I know there's only so much I can do to keep you safe. There's only so much _you_ can do."

Denzel pulled back, and Tifa let him go. He tucked his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. "I want to do more."

"I know."

"If I had been stronger, if I had known more, maybe I could have--"

"No," Tifa cut him off and took his shoulders, looking at him firmly. When she saw his eyes, she had to shake away the sudden feeling that she was seeing Cloud in them. Hadn't he always felt the same way? "What happened in the past isn't your fault, Denzel. Being stronger doesn't mean anything would have changed. You're not responsible for the decisions other people have made to protect you."

"I didn't ask them to protect me!" Denzel's face crumpled, and he pressed his eyes into his knees. "I didn't want them to die. I don't want you to die. I don't want--" He shook his head fiercely.

Tifa's heart ached, ached so much that the pain was beyond words. She curled her fingers around his arms and leaned her head against his. "I know," she whispered.

And that was really it, wasn't it? All she could really do was be there for him. She could only hold him through his pain, do her best to guide him on his path as long as she was able. It was like Cloud had told Marlene the night before: they were here now. "I know that anything could happen today, Denzel, or tomorrow or next day or the day after that. But I promise you this: I will always do my best to be here for you. I'll be damned if I go down without a fight. I know that's not much. Loving people--letting people love you--can be really hard sometimes because you don't want to get hurt, and you don't want to hurt them." Again, memories of everything that she had been through with Cloud flashed through her mind. _Don't make our mistakes, _she willed silently. _I don't want you or Marlene to take so long to realize the things that Cloud and I have had to realize. _

Maybe this was really what it was to be a mother. To watch your children grow and learn, to watch them fall down and know that you couldn't always keep them from scraping their knees…all you could do was pick them up and bandage their wounds. You couldn't always take away the pain, and sometimes they wouldn't even tell you they were hurting.

That was just part of being a family, though, wasn't it? Accepting the good with the bad, the pain with the joy, the sorrow with the happiness. Accepting the imperfect, embracing it, because after all--wasn't it the imperfections that made them human?

Tifa didn't move, her hands on Denzel's arms and her forehead still pressed against his hair as he fought so hard against his tears, the manifestation of his inner fears. "It's okay to hurt," she told him. "It's okay to be scared or mad. If you're mad at me, I don't mind. I love you no matter what."

Denzel didn't move, but his shoulders shook harder. Tifa wasn't sure how long they sat like that, but ever so slowly, Denzel's shudders subsided and his body relaxed. When he finally lifted his face to meet hers, scrubbing away the streaks of tears with his hands, his eyes were desolate. In them, she could read clearly Marlene's sentiment from last night. _Please don't go away._

"We'll do everything we can, all right?" she whispered to him.

"What if it's not enough?"

Tifa was quiet for a moment. "I wonder that sometimes, too, Denzel. Then I think--what if it _can _be enough? What if we can make it enough? Shouldn't we at least try?"

Denzel was a fighter. He always had been. Even when he had lost his parents, his caretaker, had lived on the streets, had contracted Geostigma, he had fought for his life with everything he had. Maybe that was one difference that set him apart from a lot of people. Even after everything he had been through, there was still a hope, a desire to live, that the world had not managed to stamp out of him. From what Tifa knew of his life, he had once hit a point where he almost reached the brink of despair and given up, but then Cloud had found him and brought him home. It was a thin line, sometimes, the border between hope and despair. As he sat there and considered, Tifa saw something in his eyes--a slight change, a realization, a glimpse of understanding, and he nodded slowly. "We should always try. Right, Tifa?"

"I think so. Some things are worth fighting for. I think family is one of them, don't you?"

Denzel nodded again. "Yes." He looked down again and fiddled with the hem of his shirt. "Tifa?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think it would be all right if I call you Mom _sometimes?_"

Tifa squeezed Denzel in a tight embrace, eliciting a muffled yelp from him. "I think you can call me whatever you want," she told him. "You're stuck being my son no matter what. Got it?"

Denzel's arms came back around her, and she felt him smile against her shoulder. "Yes." And then, so quietly that she barely heard him, he whispered, "Mom."

They were going to be all right, Tifa thought fiercely. They would take it a day at a time, because that was all they _could _do.

After a long moment, Denzel pulled away and wiped his face again. "Can we go finish dinner now?"

Tifa smiled. "Yes."

"Is there still cake left? For dessert?" Denzel asked as they headed out into the hallway.

"If Marlene hasn't already talked Cloud into giving her the rest…"

Denzel's eyes widened, and he leapt down the stairs two at a time. Tifa resisted the urge to tell him to be careful. He really was still such a child, and that was exactly what he needed to be. Growing up would come soon enough.

And it would come one day at a time.

_**-fin-**_


End file.
